The (Very Opinionated) Bon Appétit Guide to Weddings (2024)

When was the last time you left a wedding and thought, "That meal was delicious?" Oh, that's right. Never. There's only one wedding guarantee besides unflattering bridesmaids' dresses: The food will be forgettable. But it doesn't have to be. Follow these rules for a wedding that feels like the best dinner party you've ever thrown. (You're on your own with those bridesmaids' dresses, though.)The (Very Opinionated) Bon Appétit Guide to Weddings

Serve Up Some Hot Dogs at the Rehearsal Dinner

“No one wants a formal dinner the night before a formal wedding. Go as casual as you possibly can. We rented an art gallery, whose owner also runs a food truck, and he made Chicago-style hot dogs and Italian beefs for everyone.“ —Julia Kramer, senior editor

Make Your Guests Pay to Play

“Please, no cash bars! Your guests have most likely dished out a lot of money to be there for your big day so reward them with some well-earned booze. Can't afford an open bar? Create a signature co*cktail guests can enjoy alongside a pre-selected white, red, and a bubbly.” —Elizabeth Jaime, photo assistant

Sip Some Liquid Courage Before Walking Down the Aisle

“Do a shot or some Champagne before walking the aisle. It’s really quite uncomfortable to have every person you love in one place, staring at you with tears in their eyes. Take the edge off. But not too much edge—you want to remember this moment, after all.” —Alex Pollack, photo director

DIY the Snacky Things

The co*cktail hour is a moment you can (and should) pull off by yourself. You don’t need things on sticks or in spoons, and if anything is going to be passed on silver trays, it should be the drinks. For an impressive and satisfying co*cktail hour, all you need is some meat, some cheese, and some oysters—and it’s all cheaper and more delicious if you do it yourself.

Make People Share

“Most of the time, high-end plated stuff sucks. Fancy to me is tasty family-style food, like country ribs. We char them on the grill to add depth, which makes them an interesting alternative to your typical catered beef tenderloin. And they’re a lot more fun to eat with your hands.” —Paul Kahan, Publican Quality Meats, Chicago

Roast a Whole Pig

“A pig roast is really the easiest, most cost-effective, impressive, celebratory way to feed a bunch of people. You’re not going to get those kinds of ooohs and aaahs with chicken or fish.” —Amiel Stanek, assistant editor

Love Your Caterer

Hiring a caterer can be one of the most daunting tasks when planning a wedding. After all, as the years pass, people may forget the fact that the DJ played the Electric Slide twice in a row, but they'll hold tight to the memories of the meal—for better or worse. Well, at least the kind of folks we hang out with will. We spoke with caterers about the most important tips and biggest mistakes couples make when planning a wedding.

Be a Veggie Head

“Everybody has some kind of food issue these days—some of your guests won’t eat meat, others won’t eat gluten. I’m a big fan of passed vegetarian appetizers like roasted cauliflower with a little tahini and za’atar, or crudités with great olive oil and seasoned salt. Vegetables are very forgiving.” —Sara Jenkins, Porsena and Olives & Orange catering, New York

Just Put Dandelions in a Jar (Unless You Want To)

“Before you go the DIY route, make sure the flowers match the style of your wedding. Sure, wildflowers in mason jars are fine for farmhouse, family-style weddings. But the invitation says, ‘black tie’? Spring for the florist and do it up right.” —Adam Rapoport, editor-in-chief

Channel Your Inner Chef

“What you serve should be the best reflection of what you love. If that’s pigs in blankets, so be it. A good caterer will make them with the most delicious hot dogs he can find, then bake them in hand-rolled puff pastry.” —Jon Shook and Vinny Dotolo, Animal, Los Angeles

Shoot From the Hip

“Make sure to choose a photographer who shoots with natural light. That way, it won't seem over-done and kitschy in twenty years." —Elizabeth Jaime

Find Your Own Sweet Spot

"Choose a dessert you actually want to eat, even if that means something besides or in addition to cake. Pies are all the rage these days but seriously, do anything. Cookies! Donuts! Brownies!” —Carey Polis, senior web editor

Make a Croquembouche

Often served at French weddings, croquembouche, or "crunch in the mouth" is Christmas-tree shaped tower of pastry-cream filled pâte à choux held together with caramelized sugar. It's totally over the top.

Serve Bad Cake

Gone are the days of a simple white tiered wedding cake. Now, it’s all about adding a personal touch, whether that comes in the form of bespoke frosting or buttercream flowers.

Make the Aisle a Runway

“You don’t have to wear a dress. Pantsuits and jumpsuits have more fun!” —Julia Kramer

“As a bridesmaid who has had to endure some truly terrible dresses, I beg of you: Just tell your wedding party what the color scheme is and let them pick their own dresses. Not only will the bridesmaids get to wear something that’s flattering and comfortable, it takes the pressure off of the bride to choose something that everyone will like.” —Rochelle Bilow, associate web editor

“In a sea of ‘proper’ outfits, lots of great conversations between strangers have started thanks to a fun dress or shoes. (They don’t call them conversation pieces for nothing.) If you’re deciding between, say, a designer dress and a vintage designer dress with a great pattern, always opt for the one with the back story. And ask what the outdoor component will be before strapping into those heels.” —Christine Muhlke, executive editor

Say Yes to the Expensive Mixer

“Registries may seem weird (the adult Christmas list, basically) but just go with it. And add one crazy-expensive thing on there: a Vitamix or some four-figure bauble you’ve always wanted but know you’ll never buy. More often than not either a group of people will team up to buy it for you or that rich aunt of yours might decide to make up for the fact that she rarely sees you.” —Scott DeSimon, deputy editor

Indulge in a Little Wedding #TBT

Oh, you’re getting married soon? Well, have you researched elaborate wedding cake recipes yet and started learning how to make your own three-tiered cake? If so, you are positively insane. But you are also possibly the intended audience for decades of Bon Appétit articles dedicated to that precise topic: wedding cake recipes.

Have an After After Party

“At the end of the night, after the bride and groom have disappeared and music is winding down, have one last snack of the 'drunk food' variety to send people off. Maybe it’s tacos, falafel.… Whatever it is, it needs to be able to be consumed standing up.” —Scott DeSimon